Aren't I funny? Crazy, too.

Try sitting down sometime and try to recall your first conscious thought. The first time that you understood that you were an alive and conscious being. And your very first impressions of being you. When do we first become aware of ourselves? To the point that we have a memory of existing. If we don't have a memory we really don't know that we existed. Right? I have written things in the past that I don't remember writing. Way, way back. It's as if I had gone through motions at that time. And not bothered to record it in my memory bank. What prompts me to record it? Why do I remember some things and not others? I like to think about it. To think about thinking. Because then I'm more likely to have a memory of it. I suppose that many of our memories are imperfect memories. They are only partial memories or they have been embellished. Maybe that's why it is good to keep a journal. I can go back and more fully understand, for instance, what I was truly feeling in 1999. It helps me better understand myself today. Because I recorded my thoughts at the time. And now I can see the progress. I'm a different being than I was in 1999. In significant ways. In better ways. Oh, there's an advantage to being a writer. An advantage to recording one's thoughts. Writing. Anything. Letters. Love letters. I'm learning to tell you what's on my mind. I'm sharing my thoughts. Maybe more than some of you even want to hear. Aren't I funny? Crazy, too. --Jim Broede