A wonderful carry-over effect.

My neighbor Julie asked me today how I manage to stay even keel. In temperament. She observed that I’m relatively easy going. Nothing seems to rile me. But that isn’t true. I do get upset. But usually not about things over which I have virtually no control. We were talking about the weather. And Julie complained about the unpredictability -- hot one day, cold the next, and even snow in May. But I said it doesn’t matter to me. I’ll take whatever weather we get, and make the best of it. Because I have no control over the weather. I can’t do anything about it. Same thing goes for most everything going on in the world. Therefore, I have no choice. Stuff happens. And I accept it. Meanwhile, I try to get on with my own life. In a happy and delightful manner. By controlling what I can control. Including my attitude toward life. I count my blessings. And that’s where I put my focus. Julie could do the same. But it’s far more difficult for Julie.  Because she lives under considerable stress. Daily.  Caring for her dementia-ridden parents. In her home. I relate to Julie. Having been the care-giver for my dear sweet Jeanne on a 13-year sojourn with Alzheimer’s.  Until she died in 2007. Took me a while to properly manage the stress of care-giving. But I learned. By getting adequate respite, especially in the last three or four years of Jeanne's life. Made me a far better care-giver. By putting in 8 to 10 hours a day, instead of 24 hours.  I took control. And accepted the stuff over which I had no control. The fact that Jeanne had Alzheimer’s. For which there’s no cure. Anyway, I accepted the responsibility of dealing with it. In the right manner. Lovingly. Without anger. Without remorse. Without upset. And the experience brought a rich reward. A wonderful carry-over effect. Made me aware that I am truly in love. With life. –Jim Broede