Monday, October 8, 2007

'Don't let the unbelieving ladies drag you down.'

You know, folks, I think I’m grossly misunderstood by some of the gals in the Alzheimer’s Ladies Aid Society because I’m a romantic idealist. And they aren’t. It takes other romantic idealists to understand me. And to like me.

See, I believe in the power of love. True love. Unconditional love. And these gals think that’s pie-in-the-sky stuff. Unrealistic. The women I used to date before I found Jeanne were much like the gals in the Ladies Aid Society. They believed in security. In money. In material possessions. To fortify the nest.

Well, then came Jeanne. My ideal. A goddess. A love goddess. Love was paramount. Meant more than anything. We shared romantic notions. Always did. And that’s what made for the happy marriage. Oh, we didn’t live in poverty. But we were never affluent. We had love to keep us stable and secure. Despite all the pitfalls of life.

As a romantic idealist, I am sometimes mistaken for a Pollyanna. For being unrealistic. A dreamer.

One of the ladies wrote to me yesterday and said, “Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm for taxing the rich, helping the poor, a chicken in every pot, puppies in every yard, rainbows every morning and a full moon every night. I'm also for a world where everyone smiles all day long and goes to bed with a lullaby. Now back to reality.”

Yes, the lady was making fun of me for being a romantic idealist. Obviously, she ain’t one. But I know a woman here and there that is. One of them, Jeanne, qualifies as a full-fledged goddess. The goddess blessed me…and told me, “Keep believing, Jim. Don’t let the unbelieving ladies drag you down.” --Jim Broede

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jim---You are a romantic idealist. Your ability to turn life’s lemons into lemonade is commendable. I’m a cynical idealist. Aiming for the best and making necessary adjustments is an area that I excel in.

The power of love is something that I believe strongly in. Unfortunately, love does not have the power to cure A/D. Using the power of love to enable me to accept what I cannot change is what I’ve decided to focus my efforts on.

Most days I fall short of my goal. I’m improving. Sometimes getting close makes me feel as if I’ve figuratively earned a cigar.

Anonymous said...

Dear Jim,

Please move on with your life.

You are a wise, thoughtful person.

You are wasting those talents.

The reactions you evoke from people at the A. D. board must make you feel powerful. But that power is so sadly misused and wasted there.

You are using it too feel superior, not to be helpful.

You showed so much love and respect for Jeanne, and she would not recognize you as the self-righteous, critical bully you show yourself to be on the message board.

I don't believe you want to be that person.

There are so many ways you can use your talents.

I am an idealist, too. I believe I can be a better person. So can you.

Please, please, please move on.

Broede's Broodings said...

Dear Anonymous:

I assure you that I do not feel superior. And I do feel helpful. As a care-giver, I learned what's most important: the patient. And I'm dedicated to being an advocate and protector of patients. Moreso even than advocate and protector of care-givers. Hard as it may be to accept, some patients need protection from their care-givers. And that, dear anonymous, is primarily why I stay on, rather than move on. At least in nursing homes, the care-givers are required to have training. Certification. Required to come to work in decent shape. Unfortunately, too many 24/7 in-home care-givers are bent out of shape, mentally and emotionally and physically. And that's not good for the patient. It can be downright harmful. And I want to call attention to such problems. It's a situation that has been ignored for too long. And I'm gonna keep working to improve conditions for Alzheimer patients. Because far too many of 'em aren't getting the care they deserve. And I plan to take my case to the Minnesota Health Department. Where I hope to enlist support. Maybe for training programs for 24/7 in-home care-givers. Maybe for programs that provide assistance, and opportunities for respite. I've already talked to state inspectors about my proposal for an experimental nursing home, where all of the Alzheimer patients in the memory care unit would receive extensive supplemental care, beyond what they normally receive. To see if it makes a significant difference. --Jim Broede