Won't be easy. But not impossible.

Took me about 10 years to fully curb the anger. Actually, it wasn't until the last 38 months of my 13-year Alzheimer's sojourn with my dear Jeanne that I really got myself under control. I don't think I lost it even once in those last 38 months. Because then Jeanne was in a nursing home, 3 miles away. And in all that time, I didn't miss a single day with Jeanne. Most days I was with her 8-10 hours. Focused on Jeanne. Fully focused. Fully in love, still. Despite the Alzheimer's. I felt good about things. About being able to help Jeanne. To show my love. And still get daily respite. That made the difference. The respite, I think. I had learned to accept what was happening. I was finally able to cope. Finally able to control the situation, reasonably well. I was in a position to retire early. To have the time to care for Jeanne. But if Jeanne had not been in that nursing home, I probably would have had a breakdown. I don't think I would have been able to handle it if I had remained a 24/7 care-giver right up to the end. It was becoming impossible. Beyond my capability. Beyond my capacity. Beyond my endurance level. I found a way to adjust. Thank gawd. Yes, fellow care-givers, you, too, have to find a way to adjust. To keep your bearings. Your sanity. Your unconditional love for your mother, your father, your spouse. Exactly how you are gonna do that, I don't know. But I'll be pulling for you. Wishing you good luck. Won't be easy. But not impossible. --Jim