I offer advice around the clock.

I give advice. For free. Which annoys some people. But that's all right. Nobody has to take my advice. People give me advice. Often. Including not to give advice. But that's counter-productive. Because I always give good advice. But some people are too dumb to recognize good advice. That's their problem. No reason for me to stop telling 'em, 'Follow my advice, and you'll be better off.' Instead, they choose to be worse off. And one reason why they are worse off is because they are peeved. Annoyed. Pissed. Because I don't shut up. I have an endless stream of advice. It flows and flows and flows. I can't resist giving advice. I was born to spout advice. Morning. Noon. Night. I even talk in my sleep. So I can offer advice around the clock. --Jim Broede