Makes me crazy. In love.

I’m crazy. Because I do strange things. For the sake of true love. I have learned to accept another. Unconditionally. Oh, maybe in little ways. And not in every way. Because my premise is based on hypothetical stuff. And not a real test. Such as giving up one’s life for a true love.  One never knows. Unless pushed to the brink. Seems to me I’ve had two true loves in my lifetime.  One died. And I remained devoted. Til death. But then I set myself free. To love another. Guess it’s that when I love, it has to be a living love. One I can touch. Physically. I don’t love the physically dead as much as the living. Because I am in the physical world. Though I am aware of the spiritual world. Problem is, I’m not fully in it. I’m looking in. From afar. I’d have to be dead to be a full-fledged spirit. I’m in no hurry to get there. And I don’t know how I’d love when I get there. I’m not yet pure spirit. I can’t do the same things that a totally spiritual being can do. Maybe some of the things. But not all.  Thing is, my spirit is contained. In a sense, imprisoned. In my physical being, And I sort of like the prison. Because it gives me a taste of two worlds. All at the same time. Like sampling the food before the feast. I’m trying to be a legitimate lover. When caught between the two worlds. That makes me crazy. In love. –Jim Broede