About life and god.

I have a good feeling about life. Always have. I don't think I've ever been depressed. Oh, maybe I've been in the doldrums for a few days. But I always work my way out of it. Fast. And I get a bit annoyed. Over politics and economic and social issues. In my younger days, I thought I could change the system. Change the world, I suppose. How naive. Change comes when it's time. When the masses are moved. And the balance is finally tipped in favor of change. Not much I can do about it as an individual. So I have to be the observer. Watching. Watching. Watching. But I can create my own little world within the big world. Yes, a cocoon. That makes me happy. My handful of close associates. They have influence on me. And I influence them, too. Occasionally in very significant ways. In loving ways. Sometimes, people tell me they love just about everybody. Hordes and hordes of people. But I don't believe 'em. People tend to be more selective. Because there isn't enough love to go around, Maybe if love is handed out only in small, token doses, it becomes too diluted. The best love of all is one-on-one love. Between two people. The rest of it is more a token kind of love. Dished out when time allows. Not necessarily when it's most needed. I accept that as fact. One of the things I can't change. I don't want to tell the people closest to me that I only have a few minutes to spare, or no time at all. I want to be faithful to them. That means I all-too-often have to ignore others. I find myself portioning off my love. Rationing it. On the surface, that appears dreadful. But I think that the only being that can love everyone all the time is god. And I'm no god. --Jim Broede