As if life will be forever.

One thing about me. I want to be independent. And no burden. On anyone. Especially on a loved one. Of course, I could accept a role reversal. Caring for my amore mio. Right up to the end. I've done that once already.  With no qualms. Out of love and duty. But if I become incapacitated. Of Alzheimer's or any other dreadful affliction. I want my care left solely to the professionals. Not to a loved one. I'd even consider suicide. As a way out of my dilemma. Yes, I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm still very healthy and self-sufficient. And hope to be. For the rest of my natural life. Which means that when departing the physical realm, best that I go quickly.  Yes, I'm giving death a little more thought. Because I'm nearing the ripe age of 80. The odds keep increasing. Every year. For the infirmities of old age to set in. I dream of living forever. In keeping with my romantic idealist ways. But if I do capture forever, it won't be as a physical being. Physical life comes to an end. Inevitably. Sooner or later. Maybe the worst way to go is to linger, linger, linger. Which I find personally appalling. But don't get me wrong. I'm very much in love. With life. I rarely dwell on tomorrow. Instead, I continue to take life one day at a time. As a happy and contented lover. Dreaming. As if life will be forever. --Jim Broede