Love is good enough for me.

In the thread below, I define our living Hell. That we all live in Hell. And that there's no escape. But there is salvation. If only we fall in love. With life. Even life in Hell. I've managed to do that. I assume others can, too. And I do it by focusing on love. By forgetting about politics. One day at a time. Oh, sure, I'm often reminded of the existence of foul, obscene politics. Of Hell. But I'm fully capable of forgetting. Momentarily. Even for a single day. That I'm not in Hell. That I'm in love. In a sense, I've created Paradise inside the borders of Hell. Maybe I've duped myself. But so be it. Because I truly believe that I am in love. That I have escaped Hell. Even if I haven't. Which is good enough for me. --Jim Broede

Our living Hell.

Most of us don't bother with politics. We just get on with our lives. And ignore politics. Other than trekking to the polls now and then. To vote. With the illusion that we've got a say about who's gonna represent us in public office. That we can make a difference. But it's all a ruse. All political systems, not only in the U.S., have been designed to allow the most astute political manipulators to have their way. Usually, that means the people with the most money. The rich. They want to stay elite. Stay politically powerful. And they do that by learning how to manipulate the political systems. Not with votes. But with money. Doesn't matter who gets elected. Because elected officials can be bought. Bribed. Manipulated. By millionaires. By billionaires. By big business trillionaires. Call it whatever you want. An oligarchy. A plutocracy. Doesn't matter one iota. It's all the same. The nature of politics. Occasionally, we get an idealist vowing to change the system of patronage in Washington or a state capitol or a local community. But it turns out to be a sham. Because the system is greater than the individual. Nobody is gonna change the nature of politics and corruption. In Washington or any place. Not even Barack Obama. Not even god himself. We people on Mother Earth have been cursed. With politics. It's our Hell. With a capital H. Yes, our living Hell. We try to ignore it. Some of us even pretend that Hell doesn't exist. But believe me, it's always there. Always with us. We can't escape. --Jim Broede

Falsehood becomes racist truth.

Racists believe what they want to believe. And they don't let the facts get in way of their racist opinions. For instance, polls show that many conservative Republicans firmly believe that Obama isn't an American. That he was foreign born. And therefore, he has no right to be president. Obama's birth place is an issue with them. Only because he's black. And they don't want a black man to ever be president. Simply because he's black. But in this day and age, they can't bring themselves to publicly say that they are opposed to Obama simply because he's black. So they have to concoct another reason. That he's a foreigner. That his birth certificate from Hawaii is fake. That he really was born in Kenya or some other foreign land. Many of 'em also allege that he's a secret Muslim. Not a Christian. Of course, all of this is false. But falsehood often qualifies as racist truth. --Jim Broede

All I need.

I keep getting back to the same thought. A constant reminder. Live one day at a time. Don't get ahead of myself. That's gotta be the secret of happiness. Pursue happiness today. Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Today. Amazing that I didn't grasp that concept earlier in life. But better late than never. Thing is, I can be happy doing little things. Today, I'm gonna spend much of the day gardening. Feeling Mother Earth with my bare hands. No gloves. Imagine that. Achieving pleasure. From dirt. And the warmth of sunshine. And thoughts of love. That's all I need. --Jim Broede

Wondering if I'm vain.

The other day, I was accused of being vain. I use the word 'accused' maybe because it was meant in a negative way. Implying vain as negative. Not a good trait. But maybe it was meant mostly in a joking manner. Positively. Maybe I really am vain. After all, I wanna look good. Svelte. Well-groomed. Well-dressed. Well-mannered. Ain't all that concerned over what people think. If I'm judged as bad. I'm not overwrought. Unless it's a close friend. Then I'd be concerned. Enough to clear up the issue. To make things right. So I look better. Anyway, I'm opinionated. A jokester, too. Such actions may alienate some people. But once again, I'm not overly disturbed about it. Though I'd rather that others have a good and favorable impression. Doesn't necessarily make me vain, does it? --Jim Broede

God help us.

It'd be nice if politicians learned to be nice to each other. Showing mutual respect. Acting like gentlemen. Republicans lauding Democrats. And Democrats praising Republicans. As decent people. Disagreeing only on issues. In polite ways. And trying to reach compromise. Meeting each other half-way. Of course, that won't happen. Because it's not enough for politicians to merely disagree. They have to castigate and ridicule their opponents. Question their veracity. Even their patriotism. And their moral fiber. Used to be, decades ago, that Republicans and Democrats socialized with each other. Got to know each other personally. Now they literally hate each other. And the thing is, most of 'em say they have something in common. Their Christianity. But apparently politics come first. Rather than being a true believer, a true Christian. Or maybe they think their political activity is a reflection of their Christian values. If so, god help us. --Jim Broede

I'm gonna trick the baseball gods.

Now that I'm pulling for the Cubs to lose, they win. They broke their 12-game losing streak. To my disappointment. I wanted them to set the record for the longest losing streak in Cubs' history. They fell two games short of tying the record. Maybe the baseball gods allowed the Cubs to win because I wanted the Cubs to lose. The gods insist on teaching me a lesson. Never giving me what I want. Instead, they give me the opposite of what I want. A loss when I want the Cubs to win. And a win when I want the Cubs to lose. Maybe it's that the baseball gods don't like me. I must have offended them once upon a time. And they ain't gonna forgive me. Instead, they are inflicting eternal punishment on me. But maybe I can trick the gods. By pretending I want the Cubs to lose. All the time. The baseball gods might decide then to allow the Cubs to get into the World Series. Just to teach me a lesson. If that happens, I will have duped the baseball gods. Anyway, I've always sensed that the baseball gods aren't too smart. --Jim Broede

Amazing. Amazing. Amazing.

It happened yesterday. But I still feel the lingering, joyous spiritual effects of riding out a storm. On my bicycle. Thunder. A hard, cold rain. Mixed with pellet-sized hail. My swim suit and t-shirt soaked. Water streaming down my face. To my lips. And tongue. Quenching my thirst. Oh, the thrill. Of being alive. And communing with the forces of nature. I wasn't scared. Maybe because I was immersed. In the moment. A gift. From the almighty. The creator. Amazing. Amazing. Amazing. --Jim Broede

Not merely mediocre.

I'm celebrating. Because my Chicago Cubs lost their 12th straight game today. I desperately want the Cubs to keep losing. To set the all-time record for most consecutive losses by a major league baseball team. Admittedly, my wish may seem odd. But I've come to the conclusion that if the Cubs can't be the best team in baseball, I'd next want 'em to be the worst. Maybe it shows that I'm an extremist at heart. I'd rather my team be at either end of the spectrum. Better than in the middle. I abhor mediocrity. If the Cubs are to be bad, let them be horribly bad. Not merely mediocre. Maybe there's a psychoanalytic explanation for this. Makes me feel good. To be a fan of the worst team in baseball. It's a distinction. Shows that I'm gonna stick with the Cubs. No matter what. I'm a Cubs fan in sort of an unconditional sense. A diehard. Maybe it's a little like wishing to be the devil if one can't be god. Better to be the supreme ruler of hell rather than second or third in command in heaven. So, my dear Cubs, go for the 13th straight loss on Memorial Day. And more and more happy losses to come. Go for the record. Whatever it be. --Jim Broede

Lucky in love.

I try to avoid negative situations, negative relationships. Because negativity tends to drag me down. That's why I felt better when I left my family as a teen-ager and went off to college. It was a better, more positive atmosphere. That's why I wrote off my own sister for many years. Because she was a non-recovering alcoholic. We're on good terms today. Because she chose to recover. To get things right. One thing I've learned. I can't change individuals. Nor can I change some bad situations. So I have a choice. More or less ignore the situations. Or get out. Another thing. When I'm in love, I have absolutely no desire to change my loved one. That's the nature of true love. Unconditional acceptance. Chances are, I didn't love my sister. Because there wasn't unconditional acceptance. Maybe unconditional love is the most difficult thing to achieve. And maybe one can never be certain that it's been achieved. Because maybe the love has never been put to an ultimate test. Anyway, I feel very good when I'm in love. It's happened only twice in my lifetime. Which ain't bad. I wonder if others are so lucky. --Jim Broede

I ride only the good tides.

In life, there are good tides and bad tides. I prefer to ride the good tides. When things keep going right. Winning streaks. And usually that takes a positive mindset. All around me, I see bad tides. Bad mindsets. For instance, on my Chicago Cubs baseball team. They keep losing. They expect to lose. Day in and day out. Night in and night out. Around the clock. Always. The same goes in the world of politics. Politicians pollutted with negativity. Yes, Republicans. They are racists. Deploring the presence of a black man in the White House. They oppose everything he proposes. Because they want a black man to be a loser. In reality, the Republicans become losers. Collectively. They never break ranks. They vote as a solid block. Unanimously. Like robots. To oppose Obama at every step, at every turn. Because he's black. They accuse him of being un-American. Of being a socialist. Of being a disciple of liberation theology. In the process, Republicans don't mind bringing down the entire American nation. Just as long as it means bringing down Obama. Yes, that's a bad tide. One that I refuse to ride. I ride only the good tides. Because I'm in love. With my Italian true love. With life. With the good things. --Jim Broede

A true believer. In the impossible.

My beloved Chicago Cubs have lost 11 straight games. And I've learned to relish the losing streak. I'm hoping for the losing ways to go on and on and on. Maybe to 30 or 40 games. A world record. Because I want to study the nature of losing. How losing becomes contagious. A real team effort. It happens when one begins to feel cursed, hexed, jinxed. Maybe it starts with a single individual. Then it spreads. To a second and third player. Eventually it becomes a collective thing. Overtaking the entire team. Management. Everyone. From top to bottom. The entire team expects to lose. As if it's pre-ordained. But the Cubs have brought in new management. From Boston. To try to rid the Cubs of a longtime losing tradition. To remake the team. Starting at the very bottom. By trading away veteran players. The one's that have been immersed in losing for the longest times. In return, the Cubs would get young prospects. Players with great potential. Destined to play in the minor leagues for several years. Developing their skills. And playing baseball to win. As a team. Yes, at the lowest levels. But as they rise through the minor leagues, they'd be playing for winning teams. They'd get used to winning. Together. Collectively. So that when they finally reach the major leagues over the next three or four or five years, they'd have a winning tradition engrained. Sounds to me like it's worth a try. For Cubs fans, it'll take more patience. Putting up with continued losing streaks for a while yet. But hey, if we live long enough, we Cubs fans will be able to experience an 11-game winning streak. That'll make me a true believer. In the impossible. --Jim Broede

Pleasant diversions.

I don't like everything about life in America. But the nice thing, though, is that I can complain about it. Right here in my blog. That makes me reasonably happy. That I can gripe about my dislikes. For instance, about my government. Specifically, about Congress. And the asinine Republicans. I recognize there's nothing concrete and effective that I can do about changing the situation in our government. Doesn't matter whether I'm dead or alive. What's gonna happen is gonna happen. I won't be able to make one iota of difference. Either Barack Obama or Mitt Romney will be elected president. Either the Democrats or the Republicans will control the House and the Senate. Chances are, jackasses will be running the show. And the big-money interests will be calling the shots behind the scenes. I won't have a say. So, it's best that I get on with my life. And make the best of it. Focusing on the things over which I have some semblance of control. Over my personal life. I'm even free and able to travel. To live six months of the year in Sardinia (Italy) with my Italian true love. Yes, I'm able to pursue my kind of happiness. While pretty much ignoring things that might otherwise frustrate me. That is, if I didn't have pleasant diversions. In my constant pursuit of happiness. --Jim Broede

Feels more like shame.

It's the Memorial Day weekend in America. A holiday. Intended to remember and honor the war dead. I'm curious today. Wondering how many lives have been sacrificed in the name of American-sponsored wars. All kinds of wars. Good wars. Bad wars. Maybe some wars that fell inbetween bad and good. Depending on one's political affiliation. But in general terms, from the philosophical and spiritual perspective, I suppose all wars are bad. An indication that we humans are savages. We find it necessary to kill each other. We even wage civil wars. Americans pitted against Americans. We've learned to kill indiscriminately. Each other. Over our internal political differences. Sometimes, we don't even bother to declare war anymore. And we've developed sophisticated weapons of mass destruction. We can wipe out entire cities. With a single bomb. Hiroshima. Nagasaki. We Americans deserve credit/blame for mass killing. And not only that, we've devised moral justification for it all. We declare ourselves as morally superior to the rest of the world. Our foes. They are labeled the real savages. By the way, one doesn't have to be a soldier to be a war dead. More civilians, more women and children, more innocents, have been killed in our wars than actual uniformed soldiers. But seems to me, we've forgotten them. This weekend, we honor our soldiers. Many of whom were drafted/conscripted. Over their objections. But still, they went to war. Because it was the patriotic thing to do. Makes me wonder if our Maker approves. Makes me wonder if we've been doing the right thing all these years. Waging war after war after war. An endless string of wars. To tell the truth, I'm not feeling very patriotic today. Feels more like shame. --Jim Broede

On becoming enraptured.

I'm for making dining a ritual. Maybe even a religious experience. Especially the evening meal. Savoring small amounts of a variety of foods. Maybe an entre of chicken or fish. Nicely marinated. A fresh vegetable. A potato. A salad. A fruit plate. Bread. A beverage. The important thing is to take my time. Maybe 90 minutes. No hurry. I never gorge myself. Most people that I know would eat my supper in 15 minutes. Over and done with in quick order. That's a sacrilege. Dining should be like making love. It's gotta last. And have a spiritual quality to it. I've written about this before in my blog. It's becoming one of my favorite subjects and endeavors. I'm a particularly slow diner when I'm with my Italian true love. Her presence tends to slow me down. Creates a desire in me to make the good things in life last and last and last. Ideally, to go on forever. I'm learning to apply this principle to everything. So that I become enraptured in/with life. --Jim Broede

Sad, isn't it?

The most mean-spirited people in the world. That's how I'd describe the U.S. Congress. Our politicians. In Washington. They don't get along with each other. For a reason. They are basically a very mean-spirited group. Maybe that's the nature of politicians. All over the world. I've known plenty of politicians. Especially when I was writing for newspapers. They weren't too bad on the local level. But the one's with higher ambitions, for higher office -- well, they tend to be mean-spirited. Or so it seems to me. Maybe that's why they succeed, why they win higher office. They become ruthless. In order to get ahead. They're driven. They have a lust for power. And they know how to cultivate rich people and big corporations. They really don't care for the poor and the middle class or for the common good. They generally become Republicans. Though there are many mean-spirited Democrats and independents, too. All of them become good at playing the system. Many of 'em are natural born political manipulators. And they often are devoid of conscience. They'll do virtually anything to get their way. Even sell their souls to the highest bidder. Sad, isn't it? That I have such low esteem for the people elected to run America. --Jim Broede

I'm intrigued by it all.

I have no time for a priest or clergyman. Unless he/she is a close personal friend. Because it's important that we mentor each other. For many years, I had someone like that in my life. For which I am grateful. But he died. A while back. I miss him. When it comes to spiritual/religious/theological matters, I insist that there be a personal dialogue. In depth. It's gotta be a two-way thing. We've gotta make time for each other. Most clergymen are spread thin. They have too much on their agendas. If they don't have time for me, I don't have time for them. That's just the way it is. I've flirted with Christianity. But it's really not for me. Instead, I'm a free-thinker. A freelance monotheist. Very independent. I'm lerry of organized religions. Too many idiotic rules. And doctrines. And gawdawful thinking. But I love talking about religion and theology and philosophy. And especially about spiritual matters. I even occasionally audit courses at a seminary and in the graduate school of a university. I'm intrigued by it all. --Jim Broede

The sad story of American politics.

I'm getting a kick out of all the Republicans flocking to endorse Mitt Romney. Even his staunch opponents in the primary elections. The ones that bad-mouthed him. In rather vociferous, very disdaining ways. So badly that Barack Obama could use their quotes in campaign ads. The Republicans gave Obama plenty of ammunition. Yet, now they support Romney. As if he's the second-coming of Jesus Christ. Funny. Funny. Funny. Just goes to show the insincerity of politicians. Especially Republicans. They don't like Obama. Not so much because he's a Democrat. But because he's black. Those same Republicans secretly don't like Romney. Because he's a Mormon. Which is considered a cult by the most conservative Christian Republicans. But that's better than being black. And an intellectual, too. Republicans detest smart blacks. For not knowing their subservient place. Anyway, they think of Romney as the lesser of the evils. Because he's white. A Caucasian. And a Republican. At least in name. In the end, the only requirement is not being the detested Obama. Obama's not considered to be a true American. Instead, a foreigner. A Kenyan. With Muslim and socialist ties. A man that deserves to be despised and hated. The worst sin of all is being black, black, black. America was meant to be ruled by white men. Yes, white, white, white. And by men, men, men. Not women. And certainly not by anyone named Obama. Yes, that's the sad, sad, sad true story of American politics. --Jim Broede

My way. Minus the party.

I boycotted Ed Hinrichs' 90th birthday party yesterday. That's one way of looking at it. I bicycled past Ed's place many times. But I didn't stop to wish Ed a happy birthday. Because it was a party. And I'd be competing with all the other well-wishers. Which makes me feel uncomfortable. I prefer having Ed all to myself. One on one. Gives me better opportunity to truly converse with Ed. Maybe that's why I don't particularly enjoy parties. Generally, parties are for small talk. And one gabs with other people that one doesn't necessarily want to gab with. I'd rather wish Ed a happy day a few days from now. When he's alone. Maybe when I meet him on the street. Going around North Shore Circle on his trusty, slow-paced electric motor scooter. Which travels at a speed slower than my bicycle. I can walk my bicycle and talk to Ed at the same time. Generally, I drop in on Ed unannounced. After all, he's got lots of free time. That happens when one reaches so-called old age. In Ed's case, he likes company. But I sense that Ed does much better conducting a dialogue -- yes, one-on-one -- than dealing with the hustle-bustle and chit-chat of a birthday party. Oh, I'm sure Ed feels honored. To have a birthday party. But I wanna honor Ed in a different way. My way. Minus the party. And I will. --Jim Broede

A simple explanation.

Give me government run properly. I'll always choose that over the private sector. Especially in a capitalist society. Because government run properly is altruistic. Serving the common good. Without a monetary profit motive. I wouldn't object to experienced private business executives running government. In efficient, non-profit ways. Socialized medicine, for instance, when run properly by government can be a boon to society. Just imagine eliminating greedy profit-motivated insurance companies. A welcome relief. Of course, altruistic private organizations also could run the show effectively. The idea is to eliminate get-rich schemes of private entrepeneurs. Doesn't surprise me that folks in the private sector keep bad-mouthing government. Government is potentially their biggest competition. Because government run properly is altruistic. Not out to make a fast buck. Not out to exploit the consumers, the masses. That's why I'm pro-government. Government is supposed to serve society as a whole. The common good. While the private sector tends to serve the individual good. The selfish good. Rather than the collective good. Oh, I don't deny there's a place for the private sector. People should have the right to earn a fast buck. And to accumulate individual wealth. Within reason. But at the same time, government should be designed to serve the common good. By doing things more effectively and cheaper than private enterprise. So, little wonder that I'm in Barack Obama's camp in the upcoming election. He's got it right. Mitt Romney and the Republicans have it wrong. They put profit and the accumulation of individual wealth ahead of the collective common good. It's that simple, folks. Think of it that way. --Jim Broede

For me to savor another moment.

Once again, I'm in no hurry. Merely sitting down at my computer. And writing. Telling the world that I am in no hurry. Listening to slow music. An ode to joy. Played slowly. A moonlight sonata. Played slowly. Mixed with the sound of ocean surf. Rolling in. Slowly. The skies are overcast. The threat of rain. A slow rain. No wind. My beloved cat, Loverboy, rolled into a ball. On a soft cushion atop my desk. He's sleeping. Dreaming. Breathing. Slowly. Peacefully. Soon I will connect. On Skype. To my Italian true love. In Sardinia. But there's no hurry. Life and love proceeds. Lingering. Ever so slowly. Almost feels as if time is gonna stop. For me to savor another moment. --Jim Broede

I'll seize happiness now.

It's wise to listen to me. That's what I tell my wayward friends. The ones that don't listen. Because they don't want to hear what I have to say. Don't wanna face the truth. They are liars. The worst kind of liars. Because they lie to themselves. And refuse to be happy. They embrace unhappiness. Like religious zealots. Oh, they'll pretend happiness. But it's all fake. Self-deception. They actually wanna be nailed to a cross. Because that might bring them sainthood. Yes, in their minds and hearts, they were brought into the world to suffer. They welcome death. Wishing for happiness. On the other side. But I'm not gonna take that gamble. I'll seize happiness now. In love. --Jim Broede

Not in Sparta.

I know so very many Spartans. People who deny themselves the finer things in life. Such as happiness. Instead, they scrimp. They keep their noses to the proverbial grindstone. Even deny themselves vacations. It's almost as if they flagelate themselves. As if they deserve to be punished. But occasionally, I convince 'em to become Athenians. And I marvel at the breakthrough. They take vacations. They go to concerts and plays. And they read books. They fall in love. With the finer things in life. They learn to make their work play. Pure pleasure. Before it's too late. Yes, life was meant to be savored. Not occasionally. But daily. Fully. One day at a time. And it's best lived in Athens. Paradise. Not in Sparta. Hell. --Jim Broede

Over the right wing cliff.

Making profits. That's supposed to be good. And the credo of capitalism. But seems to me that the morally right thing is to reduce profits. In order to benefit humankind. And society as a whole. Yes, to serve the common good. Capitalists all over the world are making big profits for their companies. But in the process, they are exploiting people. Laying off workers. And often paying extremely low wages. And polluting the environment. Along the way, the corporate bosses become millionaires and billionaires. And the gap continues to widen between the rich and the poor. Conservatives and Republicans pretty much want to keep things the way they are. But President Obama and left-leaning Democrats prefer change. More socialism and less profit. It's gonna be a tough fight. Politically. Because the big-money interests keep pouring money into the political campaigns. Supporting conservatives and Republican causes. It's gonna be tough for advocates of the common good to carry the day. I'm worried. After all, people tend to be gullible. Many of 'em believe lies and distortions in political campaign ads. Yes, so many, many Americans are downright stupid. When it comes to politics, they believe the idiotic sound bites. They follow the pied pipers. Over the right wing cliff. --Jim Broede

My Cubs: Losing in positive ways.

I wonder why it's so important to win. A baseball game, for instance. After all, it's only a game. Not a life and death struggle. I'm trying to get used to losing. Making it no big deal. Because I'm a Chicago Cubs fan. I'd like the Cubs to win. And to win the World Series. But in the grand scheme of life, a baseball game is merely a baseball game. So many more important things. But still, I wish for the Cubs to win. And I get disappointed if they don't. Which is silly. Actually, losing can be just as elating and rewarding as winning. If one thinks of losing in a positive way. As record-setting. For instance, the Cubs have lost 7 straight games. In startling ways. The Cubs haven't even held a lead in a ball game over the last 50 innings. And they are on pace to lose 104 games this season. Which would be just as remarkable as winning 104 games. Because losing requires historic bumbling. Ineptness that almost borders on skillful ineptness. Anyway, I wake up each day. Ready to plug into the Cubs game. Wondering what new and original way the Cubs will find to lose another game. And sure enough, they almost always find a unique and innovative way. --Jim Broede

I'm tuned in.

I'm a writer. And I enjoy writing. Really do. That's important. Makes me happy. Doing what I wanna do. But I know so very many people that hate their jobs. Their occupations. The way they make their livings. And that's sad. I'm retired. But I never gave up writing. Because it's fun. Pleasure. Not work. I write more since I retired. But I write what I want to write. Without having to cater to an editor. Gives me a sense of freedom. I don't necessarily write to please other people. Instead, I'm trying to please me. If I happen to please other people -- well, then that's a bonus. But it's not a requirement. When I write, it's a little bit like talking to myself. Which is all right. Because I'm a good listener. Capable of carrying on a highly intelligent conversation. With myself. I'm tuned in. --Jim Broede

All kinds of people.

My neighborhood has an international flavor. And to think, I didn't even know it. Until I decided recently to get to know the neighbors. I discovered Matt, a Korean. And Cristina, a Brazilian. For all I know, there may be others from foreign countries. Because I'm still in the process of discovery. Of course, others act like they are from another planet. Maybe Pluto. They're a bit odd. Being staunch supporters of lunatic fringe Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann. The looney who flirted with the idea of seeking dual citizenship, in Switzerland. She abandoned the idea when fellow conservatives implied that would make her abhorrently unpatriotic. When really, she's a natural born, robotic idiot. That's what I like about the world. All kinds of people. --Jim Broede

Bad love and good love.

I revere my parents. For having brought me into the world. But I don't want to be like my parents. Or exactly like anyone. I'd rather be me. My own self. My own being. I've learned lessons from my parents. And others. Even from people that are no longer living. I keep feeling my way. Evolving. Acquiring my own consciousness. Shaping my own soul. In that sense, I'm an individual. Unique. But still, I have a yearning to sacrifice myself. To work for the common good. To not accumulate an excess of material goods. Though I probably possess more things than I should. Guess it's that I wanna feel good. And happy. Yes, that's it. I'm in the pursuit of happiness. And I'm discovering that happiness is linked to love. I have to love. In so very many, many ways. Limitless ways. That's the purpose of life. I suppose one could love money, too. But I'm not sure if that's a good kind of love. I'm wondering if there's bad love and good love. --Jim Broede

Savoring life.

I'm slowing down. Which happens. As one ages. Used to run a mile in 7 minutes. Won't ever achieve that again. As well as some other athletic/physical feats. But there's one thing I'm better at. Savoring. Whatever it is that I do. I bicycle 30 miles a day. And often walk eight to 10 miles a day. No, I'm not breaking any speed records. But I savor moving about. Staying active. Physically. Mentally, too. My 90-year-old friend Ed laments a little over being unable to perform like he did in his good old younger days. But I keep reminding Ed to savor whatever it is he does. For instance, when I visited Ed the other day, he was imbibing. Had a beer. And I encouraged Ed to savor every last sip. And Ed can't walk around the block any more. But hey, he can still ride his electric-powered motor scooter. That allows Ed to savor the motion. And the fresh air. Yes, one doesn't need everything. Life can be wonderful. Even at 90. Just savoring whatever it is that one's got. Namely, life itself. --Jim Broede

Bored people are good people.

I know people that are bored with life. Because they are blind. Not literally blind. But because they don't see the beauty of life. They are unaware. They don't see the green in grass. Instead, it's drab. When really, there's no green more vivid than grass. Or a green door. Or the green leaves on a tree branch. Or the dark green needles on an evergreen. Another thing. Bored people are out of love. It's virtually impossible to be bored when one is in love. Because love is stimulating. Still another thing. Bored people lack curiosity. They don't ask questions. They don't seek answers. But I don't mind talking to bored people. If for no other reason than to discover why they happen to be bored. In that way, bored people are good people. Because they keep me from being bored. --Jim Broede

I've learned to live. Happily.

I'm able to live happily. Reasonably happily. From day to day. Of course, I can't say that every day I've ever lived has been happy. But the unhappy days have been few and far between. All the more reason to take life one day at a time. Because the odds are stacked heavily in my favor. I inherently and instinctively know it's gonna be a good day. And if something goes wrong, it's probably fixable. I've even learned to make a bad day a good day. A bad experience, a good experience. For instance, I was a care-giver for my Alzheimer-afflicted dear sweet wife for 13 years. Not exactly what one would call good times. But eventually, I learned to salvage something good from each day. And I still savor the goodness. My time actually being in love. Truly in love. Which allows one to put up with the bad times. And concluding that it was worth it. I wouldn't trade the experience. Because it's helped me become what I am today. Happy. Ultimately, what once seemed bad turned out to be good. So many events in my life. Some that led to grief. But the grief dissipated. Disappeared. Evolved into a feeling of love. Pure love. And that offset the negativity. Presto. Today it's a positive. Helped me to better understand and embrace the concept of happiness. Yes, I've learned to live. Happily. --Jim Broede

A real bastard.

I'm ashamed of the owners of the Chicago Cubs. The Ricketts family. Oh, maybe not the entire faimily. It's the guy at the top. The father. The patriarch. Joe Ricketts. He's a bastard. A hateful capitalist. Scum of the Earth. Maybe he's been spoiled by money. He's super, filthy rich. A billionaire many times over. He paid a billion dollars for the Cubs. And he's got more billions to spare. He's set up a Super PAC. With $10 million. Spare change for him. That he wants spent on defaming Barack Obama. Getting people to hate Obama. So that they don't give Obama a second term. Instead, Ricketts wants Republicans elected. So the rich can get richer. Often at public expense. For instance, the Ricketts want a public subsidy to help improve Wrigley Field, the historic ballpark in which the Cubs play losing baseball. Season after season. Yes, Ricketts has no problem with the concept of socialism that benefits private corporations. That pads the pocketbooks of billionaires. But he's against Obama. Because of Obama's socialist leanings aimed at benefiting poor people and the middle class. In establishing a social safety net. No, that ain't the socialism that Ricketts wants. He wants it all for himself. He's a greedy capitalist. A real bastard. --Jim Broede

The primary role of government.

When people are out of work. In times of a bad economy. In a recession. Or in a depression. I want the people put back to work. And if the private sector won't or can't create the jobs -- well, then I want government to create the jobs. It's that simple. It's the decent, humane, proper, moral thing to do. To hell with austerity programs. I want stimulus. Yes, the creation of work. Employment for everyone. Because over the long haul that's the fix for an ailing economy. Put people back to work. No matter what. Overcome the obstacles. Go deeper in debt, if that's necessary. Again, let me say it. To hell with austerity. In Greece. In Spain. In Italy. In Portugal. In Ireland. In the USA. Everywhere. I want near full employment. Work for everyone willing to work. Yes, work at a decent, living wage. I'm talking about productive work. Beneficial to society as a whole. Fixing the world's infrastructure. Providing basic services for fellow human beings. For everyone. For the common good. And if that means raising taxes on the well-off, on the affluent, on the rich, on big private corporations -- then so be it. Now we have a world of super rich and dreadfully poor. That ain't right. It doesn't have to be. Yes, the world can fix all of its problems. By putting people back to work. Fixing the problems. Making for a better world. We have 7 billion living people in the world. The most ever. And there's gonna be more. And it's time for us to learn to truly take care of each other. It's gonna take more than merely taking care of our individual selves. In selfish, greedy ways. It has to be an inspired collective effort. Everyone pitching in. Yes, folks, that means a spreading of the wealth. Among other things. Utopia is possible. Or something much closer to Paradise than what we have now. I know it's possible. Because I've found it. On my own. But some of us need more help than others. And I have a responsibillity to help others find basic decent living, too. It's the primary role of government. --Jim Broede

On getting to know Ed.

I have a new friend. Ed Hinrichs and I have lived in the same neighborhood. Since 1969. But we never really got to know each other until several weeks ago. When I made the effort. To become better acquainted with my neighbors. I had seen Ed many times. But had never really bothered to get to know him. I suspected that he had become the oldest guy in the neighborhood. And sure enough, he is. Ed will turn 90 next week. That makes him 14 years older than me. So Ed helps me feel young. Relatively speaking. Ed tells me that growing old isn't a blessing. That it has it's drawbacks. For instance, Ed doesn't walk any more. He rides what he calls a scooter. With an electric motor. And he gave up his lifelong hobby of woodcarving a year ago. And he's barely able to read because of deteriorating eyesight. But Ed still functions well. Maybe that's his biggest blessing. My blessing, too. Because I have the opportunity to converse with Ed. About lots of things. His life. My life. Ed knows that he's slowed down. Physically. Mentally. But he's still upbeat. Aware that he's had a good life. Ed's wife died in 1994. But he's got three living daughters and eight grandchildren and a flock of great grandchildren. And he's got an endless array of fond memories. He's always enjoyed life. That makes Ed a good mentor. For the likes of me. Because I wanna age gracefully. And that's what Ed teaches me. I'm also gonna try to mentor Ed. By helping to keep his mind active. And letting him know that he has a new-found young friend. Me. --Jim Broede

On becoming a curious tailor.

I have friends that I leave alone. Because I sense they want to be left alone. They live in the same town. Close by. But still, I leave them alone. Even when they are having difficulty. I'm not sure that's the right thing to do. Maybe friends are supposed to intervene. And sometimes, I do. But other times, I don't. Because I expect them to ask for help. If they need it. If they want it. Maybe I'm wrong about that. Maybe I shouldn't wait for an invitation. Funny thing. I'll help a stranger who isn't a friend. Making inquiries. Out of curiosity. At the same time that I ignore a friend. Out of respect for privacy. Makes me wonder why I'd foist myself on a stranger, but not on a friend. Although, come to think of it, there are certain friends that need foisting. When they don't want it. Makes me think I have to become a curious intervening tailor. When dealing with friends. --Jim Broede

Everything tends to be boundless.

I let my friends be themselves. In fact, I encourage it. I have absolutely no desire to change my friends. That's why they are friends. I accept them. More or less unconditionally. But I don't require that they accept me. Because I believe in free choice. In letting people be themselves. Even if they aren't my friends. I find that I can occasionally annoy a friend or two. But that's no surprise. I'm capable of being an annoying sort of guy. It's my nature. But still, I'm likeable. Easy-going. Though I can act angry. When I'm really not. But faked anger can be good for effect. Especially when it's in a straight-faced, humorous vein. Goes to show that I like the complexities of life. Some of my best friends are complex. And unpredictable. Full of surprises. I like that. Usually, that's a sign that they are evolving. Another thing. My friends don't have to be human. My cat, Loverboy, for instance. He's one of my best friends. And he's just a cat. But a very special cat. He lives with me. And we talk. Daily. He's a truly intimate friend. I've had dogs as friends. But Loverboy is closer to me than any of my past dog friends. Maybe it's because he's with me now. I grieved when I lost some of my dog friends. But I'm over that. Which is a good thing. Because it's important to get on with life. Thing is, I've learned that I have more friends than I ever imagined. All kinds of 'em. That's the way it is. When one is in love. With life. Everything tends to be boundless. --Jim Broede

A full-fledged mental disorder.

Listened to a radio talk show today. And the topic was about grieving. And the fact that psychiatrists are starting to call grieving a 'disorder.' But the talk show host claims that's silly. That grieving is a natural thing. And that everyone grieves in his/her own way. But I'm of a mind that some people grieve far too long. And grieving then becomes a mental disorder. And it should be treated. One way or another. With talk therapy or drugs or a combination of the two. I know people that seem to never get over their grieving. They've become mentally sick with grief. A man called in. He was still grieving over his daughter's suicide 24 years ago. Still cries over it. Sounded like he could use psychotherapy. So that he learns to let go of his grief. Seems to me it's become more than grief. A full-fledged mental disorder. --Jim Broede

The Chinese will prevail.

Generally speaking, I'm willing to wheel and deal. To give and take. To compromise. Especially when there's a political, economic or social dispute. Can't always have my way. That's a fundamental lesson of life. So I accept it. Though I encounter many people who don't want to budge. Out of principle. But more likely out of stubbornness. Selfishness. They want everything. That's what we have going on in American politics now. Ultra conservative Republicans. They want everything. Gambling everything. Even at the risk of all or nothing. They would rather wreck/destroy America if they can't have their way. Greedy capitalism. A dictatorship of the wealthy, the monetarily rich. Rule by millionaires and billionaires and big corporations. And to hell with the poor and the middle class. It's a dangerous game they are playing. Because it ignores the common good. I suspect that's why America is on the decline. And China is coming on strong. Economically. Politically. Socially. The Chinese have a different perspective. Different values. Because the world has changed. If for no other reason than there's more of us. Billions and billions and billions of people. With basic needs. And China is doing a better job of serving those needs. America has seen its best days. But China is on the rise. On the ascent. Because China has adapted. With an effectve mix of socialism and capitalism. To serve the common good. Maybe Americans, especially conservative Republicans, see that as sacrificing individual freedom. But the Chinese see what we Americans have been doing as exploitation. As greedy capitalism. As an ignoring of the common good. And I'm inclined to believe that the Chinese are on the right side of history. The Chinese will prevail. The Chinese will have the world's No. 1 economy. Some day soon. I can accept that. It's a good thing. Because China has taken to the moral high ground. --Jim Broede

Hypocritical Christians.

I asked World War II veteran Ed Hinrichs (my neighbor) if he was bothered having to fight and kill Germans. Especially since he's of German heritage. Ed came up with a surprising and thoughtful answer. What fazed him, he said, was the fact that Christians on both sides were fighting and killing each other. Americans and Germans largely share the same religious faiths. But that didn't stop them from going to calamitous war. Sounded sort of un-Christian to Ed. He's Catholic. Anyway, I gotta agree with Ed. Thing is that people of the same religious faiths, even of the same denomination, often find that they are adversaries. In fact, arch enemies. Pitched against each other. In war. Strictly because of politics. Turns out they sometimes hate each other. When their shared religions call for them to love -- even their enemies. Might be nice if some day one's spiritual beliefs carry more weight and priority than one's political beliefs. Right now in America, we have a great political divide, verging upon the hateful, between Democrats and Republicans. But both parties are dominated by self-professed Christians. Maybe with a hypocritcal bent. Acting more like non-Christians when it comes to politics. --Jim Broede

Ed...and a bygone era.

I'd not want to do what my neighbor Ed Hinrichs did. Flying 32 missions in World War II. Bombing raids over German cities. And yes, the thought occurred to Ed that he may have bombed some of his German relatives. But that's a dreadful thing about war. Ed never knew the victims. Maybe just as well. The bombs dropped from 12,000 feet. And Ed recalls that it was hard to hit a specific target. Depended on weather conditions. Winds often took bombs far off target. Ed's crew bombed Berlin and Ludwigshafen and Saarbrucken. So many cities. Cities I've been to. Places where Hinrichs and Broedes lived then and now. Fortunately, my paternal grandfather left Germany around 1900 and sneaked into the U.S. As an illegal immigrant. He missed World War I by declaring that he was 5 years older than his actual age. Thus he avoided the draft. He didn't wanna be sent back to Germany to fight Broedes, or anyone. Gotta give him credit for that. And for coming to America. Otherwise, I wouldn't have been born. Because it was in the U.S. where he met my grandmother. And they had three children, including my father. Anyway, Ed's ancestors also came from Germany. A generation or two before mine. Ed didn't try to avoid fighting in World War II. He enlisted. In the Air Force. And tried to become a pilot. But flunked out of training. Instead, he became a mechanic on a B-17 bomber crew stationed in England. From there, they routinely flew on dangerous bombing missions. Ed was one of the lucky ones. He survived. Most didn't. Next week, Ed will turn 90. For which I am grateful. Gives me opportunity to really get to know Ed. And to get him to talk about a bygone era. --Jim Broede

A proclivity for moral ineptitude.

Ultra conservative Republicans have the morality thing all wrong. Just about everything that they advocate is morally wrong. Especially when it comes to their promotion of greedy capitalism. Instead of socialism. Which serves the common good. Rather than the good of the monetarily rich. As a socialist, I'm on the side of history. And ultimate progress. Eventually, there'll be a narrowing of the gap between the rich and the poor. Slavery was morally wrong. And the longtime denial of equal/civil rights for women and for minorities (blacks) was morally wrong. But as time passed, even some of the most stupid Republicans recognized/admitted that America had been morally wrong on these issues. Unfortunately, even in modern times, Republicans insist on being morally wrong on just about everything. That's the nature/essence of the Republican mind and soul. A proclivity for moral ineptitude. --Jim Broede

Our greedy primitive ways.

Everybody should be entitled to an affordable education. Yes, that means I'm for socialized education. Just as I am for socialized medicine. And social security. I want a socialized society. In which the basics are guaranteed everyone. Of course, this means a redistribution of wealth. A spreading of the nation's wealth. Taking from the obscenely rich. In order to afford basics for everyone. To serve the common good. This approach to life ain't gonna come easy. Because it'll require a change in attitudes. Away from traditional capitalist values. Not everyone should have the right to be filthy, monetarily rich. Only modestly rich. That's my opinion. And I ain't afraid to voice it. Knowing full well that I'm living way ahead of my time. This isn't a society that will come about in my lifetime. But it'll happen eventually. Because it's the right thing to do. The moral thing. Advanced, highly intelligent societies elsewhere in the cosmos probably are living in a socialized way now. We earthlings are still living in crude, primitive ways. We earthlings worship money. And a wide gap between the rich and the poor. A stratification of the classes. Survival of the monetarily richest. And to hell with everybody else. Yes, that's a primitive notion. Coming out of the cavemen mentality. Maybe it'll take hundreds of thousands of years before we earthlings throw off the shackles of our greedy primitive ways. But I'm confident that it'll happen. Some day. Socialism will reign supreme. --Jim Broede

To be or not to be.

I know people on suicidal paths. And they know it. But still they persist. My question: Should anyone intervene? The thing is that people commit suicide in different ways. Usually, we think of it as an overdose of sleeping pills, or shooting or hanging one's self. But there are other, more popular ways. Slow and methodical. Such as smoking a pack or two of cigarettes daily. Or by consuming inordinate amounts of alcohol. They are all effective methods of suicide. And many of 'em are readily tolerated by society. Generally, we leave it up to the individual. Though we pretend to frown on suicide. We accept it. As an option. If only by our inaction. Choosing not to intervene. I have close friends in the process of committing suicide. Addicted smokers, for instance. They won't allow me to intervene. And if I try, they get pissed. Tell me to mind my own business. Of course, I'd like to think of it as my business. To prevent a suicide. But it's not that easy. And too often I mind my own business. Ultimately, to my regret. I see it coming. And I do nothing about it. Oh, I try sometimes. But usually with little success. I've learned to accept suicide as a part of life. I don't get too despondent over it. Sometimes, I construe suicide as a good thing. In the case of my father, as an example. He was a habitual gambler, and got into lots of trouble as a result. Decided it was best to end his life prematurely. At a young age. Only 38. I'm sure there were other options. Better options from my point of view. But certain addicted, suicide-bent friends and acquaintances keep telling me, mind my own business. That my way isn't their way. That they prefer suicide. Don't intervene. It's their decision. To be or not to be. --Jim Broede

Acting like an idiot.

My ultra conservative Republican congresswoman got carried away the other day. In a nice way. But Michele Bachmann eventually decided that was out of character. That it was un-American to get carried away the way she did. To almost everyone's surprise, Bachmann had announced that she was going for dual citizenship. She was gonna become a citizen of Switzerland. No, she wasn't gonna renounce her American citizenship. Because she's a super patriot. She often has questioned the loyalty of her fellow members of Congress. Especially Democrats. Including Barack Obama. For their alleged un-American socialist ways. Turns out that Bachmann's husband has Swiss roots. His parents came from Switzerland. And that entitles him and the members of his current family to be Swiss citizens. Bachmann's children were thrilled with the idea/opportunity of becoming Swiss citizens. Sounded rather romantic and worldly. So the family started the necessaary paperwork for dual citizenship. And Michele seemed captivated by the idea that even she could be a Swiss citizen. But suddenly, she realized that would hurt her image. Especially with patriotic American lunatic fringe Republicans. Might even hurt her chance for reelection. Because the Swiss are socialists. They even have socialized medicine. Which is abhorrent to Bachmann. So she excised her name from the application. Declaring she wants no part of Swiss citizenship. That she wants to remain completely, totally pro-American. Even if that means acting like an idiot. --Jim Broede

Good needs to be cultivated.

Some people don't want me to be me. Even a friend or two occasionally tries to change me. Wants me to be less open. More reserved. More cautious about what I have to say. Yes, less opinionated. Of course, I don't worry about it. I continue to be me. By letting people know what's on my mind. Yes, I practice thinking. Out loud. That offends some people, I'm sure. I easily offend Republicans and rednecks and religious zealots. And more, too. I'm a natural born offender. But I often try to offend in amusing ways. For the laughs. I try not to offend in mean-spirited ways. But hey, it's difficult not being mean-spirited to the mean-spirited. Fortunately, all of my very close friends are kindly-spirited. Come to think of it, virtually all of the mean-spirted people I know are Republicans, rednecks and religious zealots. I'm sure there are others. And don't get me wrong. Not all Republicans, rednecks and religious zealots are mean-spirited. I know some that are pretty decent people. Deep down. They just have trouble showing it. Maybe that makes me a positive thinker. I see some amount of good in everyone. It just needs to be cultivated. --Jim Broede

By a thinking, talking cat.

I like to make momentous daily decisions. Because that helps make me feel alive. As if I'm a real decider. I wasn't sure whether I should get up this morning. I was awake. But I told myself to stay in bed a while longer. Because my cat Loverboy was on top of my chest. And he felt sort of good. I sensed that he wanted to be close to me. Maybe because I'm relatively soft. And relatively warm. Makes me a good mattress. Maybe that goes through Loverboy's mind. But I suspect he thinks of me as a big cat. A cool cat that exudes warmth. Also, he may think of me as a meal ticket. He comes running every time I pop open a can of his favorite cat food. I'm used to living with cats. Though now that I spend half of the year with my Italian true love in Sardinia, I leave Loverboy and his mate Chenuska behind. To live without me. But I bring in a house-sitter that feeds and plays with the cats. I wonder if the cats miss me. Or if they even have a conscious thought that I'm gone. When I return, months later, they always greet me with enthusiasm. Loving affection. But maybe they do that to everyone. Especially Loverboy. His name is very appropriate. He's earned it. As a natural born loverboy. I talk to Loverboy. It's as though he's a real person. A human being. Sometimes, we rub foreheads. A symbolic gesture of thought transference. I imagine what's on Loverboy's mind. And I suspect he reads my mind, too. Even from a distance. For instance, just a moment ago I had a thought. Where is Loverboy? I'd like to see him. And sure enough, he shows up. Wandering into my study. Where he glances outdoors through the sliding glass doors. Then he jumps up to my desk. To a soft cushion. Where he's gonna stay. Until I leave. And he'll accompany me. All over the house. Even to the bathroom. I have no privacy. But it's a good feeling. I am genuinely loved. By a thinking, talking cat. --Jim Broede

Maybe I made the right choices.

Eternal recurrrence. Maybe there is such a thing. The philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche advanced the concept. That we live our lives over and over and over again. Or that maybe we should assume we do. And therefore, we should live life in a way that we wouldn't mind living exactly the same life again. For eternity. In other words, try to live a truly fulfilling and personally gratifying life. The kind of life we really wish to live. Anyway, the thought of eternal recurrence came to me tonight. And it has at other times, too. When I have a feeling of deja vu. That I've just lived this moment, this particular experience, before. That I know what's coming. Even before it happens. Gives me a sense of getting ahead of myself. Living in my future before it happens. Yes, I momentarily get ahead of myself. Instead of living in the now, I'm getting a sneak preview of my future. I anticipate an outcome. With certainty. There's no stopping it. No altering it. Because it already occurred. It's like watching the same movie. Over and over again. One anticipates the words. The action. The event. The outcome. Before one sees the scene on the screen. I'm living in my own story. Very much like in a novel. And it's gonna unfold the same way. All the time. Every time. Everything is predetermined. I'm not sure if I like such a reality. But if my life is a re-run -- an eternal recurrence -- maybe I made the right choices the first time around. I hope so. --Jim Broede

The best part of life.

My acquaintances and friends find themselves in my blog. They aren't necessarily identified as such. By name. For the most part, I keep them anonymous. Seems to me it makes sense. To integrate them into my daily broodings. Because they have influence. An effect. Often significant. On my life. On my thinking. I am what I am, in large part, because of the people I know. And encounter. Even strangers. I'm curious. But I always could be more curious. I want there to be no limits to my curiosity. Another thing. I want to share my curiosity. Things that I've learned. About life. About the world. About everything. I can't fully keep up with it all. Which is all right. Best to let life overflow. To be bountiful. Of course, that may give the impression that I'm ignoring stuff. Including some people. Because I can't be everything to everybody. So I write about what's on my mind. Because it's a way of sharing. It's an open letter, of sorts. To everyone. A reservoir for my thoughts, my observations. Much of it personal. So many ways to communicate. With two-way exchanges (dialogue) being one of the best. And that's usually done outside my blog. One-on-one. But still, I like to share. What I've learned. About the personal nature of life. Yes, that's the best part of life. The intimacies. --Jim Broede

I'll leave for good. My own good.

Nostalgia is nice. But hey, I don't wanna return to the 18th century. Seems to me that's what ultra conservative Republicans would have us do. Live like in the old times. When our founding fathers knew what was good for us. And it was. In the 18th century. But I have a reminder for Republicans. We're living in the 21st century. And we gotta adapt. To changing times. To new ways. This ain't the same world it was in 1787. We may even need a new Constitution. New rules to live by. Shucks, we've already made progress. Freed the slaves. And gave blacks and women human rights. Let's not write off those gains. I know that Republicans would like to retrench and take away those rights. And maybe even set up a plutocracy or a theocracy. As long as it's Christian. But hey, Republicans, that ain't gonna pass muster. But if some how you can bamboozle most of the people most of the time, and take over the USA government -- well, then I gotta give you credit. Take over. You will have won fair and square. And I'll leave America. For good. My own good. --Jim Broede

I refused to sell my soul.

I have a distaste for politics. But gotta admit that maybe I enjoy the game of politics. To some degree. Especially when I was younger. Because it was easier then to proceed in a ruthless manner. Without much conscience. Just for the sake of getting my way. Now I'm inclined to play fairly. With an open mind. In a more or less non-partisan way. But still, I'm partisan. In that I'm a liberal. With socialist and communist leanings. I sort of despise Republicans. Especially the ultra conservatives. And those associated with the Tea Party or religious groups. I remember attending a political party caucus when I was in my early 20s. And left feeling sick. To my stomach. And in spirit, too. Because I was being encouraged to think like a robot. Really, to not think at all. To follow the dictates of the party. Which went against my independent and maverick streak. Felt a little like selling my soul. To the devil. To evil spirits. Guess I was learning. That politics is a game. About achieving power. It wasn't until I was 36 that I had the courage/stupidity to personally test the achieving of elected political office. I ran for the local school board. And got elected. By campaigning door to door. And handing out a calling card. Proclaiming that I would be a good listener. And easily accessible. I gave out my home telephone number. Call me. Anytime, I said. I also defined my stance on all sorts of school and education-related issues. And I poked fun at the current school board. I was aware that the board would pick a new superintendent during my three-year term. And I wanted a big say in that matter. Turned out that the board voted 5-1 to offer the job to a particular guy. I was the dissenting vote. Didn't think the guy was suited for the job. And so I telephoned him. Told him so. And lo and behold. He listened. And turned down the job. That pissed off the rest of the school board. I was accused of sabotaging the hiring. Guess there was some truth to the charge. And it became apparent that if I endorsed anyone for superintendent, it would be the kiss of death. So I kept my mouth shut. And the board ended up hiring a guy I secretly favored. Which gave me a sense that I had achieved a political victory. That I had gotten my way. By alienating everyone. I finished my term on the school board. But never sought any kind of elected political office again. Because it would have made me a professional politician. Which meant I'd have to sell my soul. To the devil. --Jim Broede

Love: A cure for the doldrums.

Makes me feel good when I've played a role in making someone happy. Did that recently. Wasn't me that accomplished the feat. I can only make myself happy. But I'm able to occasionally convince a friend/acquaintance to become happy. But it's him/her that has to perform the act. To live life in a way that brings about personal happiness. Unfortunately, some people don't wanna be happy. Or they don't know how. Or they're scared. Because happiness sometimes requires a major life change. Getting out of a bad marriage/relationship, for instance. Or finding another job. Or moving away. Maybe even living a solitary life. It takes courage to move on. To diligently pursue genuine happiness. Because often there's some risk involved. Such as a loss of security. Some people merely want to play life safely. Very safely. Even if it means staying in an unhappy situation. Yes, I know people that don't put a premium on happiness. They accept living unhappily everafter. Maybe it's that they are in a rut. And they don't know how to get out. Or they don't have the initiative. The gumption. I often counsel unhappy people. Some of 'em tell me they are in depression. Maybe so. But I don't always buy it. Instead, they are mentally and emotionally lazy. They lack motivation. They have negative attitudes. About life, in general. Yes, that's it. They haven't fallen in love. With anything. Little wonder that they are unhappy. --Jim Broede

And god created scum.

Ultimately, I'll believe what I wanna believe. Even if I don't believe it. Yes, that sounds like a contradiction. And it probably is. Instead, it's a recognition that not everything is believable in terms of human comprehension. So I have to accept the premise that all things are possible. Though I can't say it for sure. It's like asking whether there's a god. When one can't even define god. But I wanna believe in other dimensions. Other forms of life. Which I cannot see or grasp. Because I lack the necessary senses. Which means that human life is not the highest form of life. In fact, we humans may be one of the very lowest forms of life. But the most stupid amongst us may assume that humans are the highest form. Yes, god's ultimate creation. Which would go to show that god must be an idiot. A concept that I can't buy into. There's no finer proof that god knew what he was doing. That he set out to create scum. And he succeeded. By making politicians. With the scumiest being Republicans. --Jim Broede

Many clowns and court jesters.

I've noticed something about conservative politicians. They also seem to be quite religious. Not necessarily spiritual. But religious. They belong to Christian churches. Especially churches of fundamentalist and evangelical an pentacostal persuasion. Liberals, meanwhile, seem less religious and more spiritual. Many of 'em don't belong to churches. And if they do, it's usually liberal denominations. Liberals are far more likely than conservatives to be agnostics or atheists. That's my anecdotal observation. Maybe I'm wrong about this. But I don't think so. Of course, I'm looking at this from a liberal perspective. Because I'm a political liberal and a free-thinker on spirtual/religious matters. Yes, I admit to being biased. I'm drawn to liberal causes. Politically. Economically. Socially. And I'm uncomfortable with religious zealots. Though I try to accept and understand them. But often, I find myself laughing. Because I see their funny side. Hard to take them seriously. Though I know they are serious. Which is exactly what makes them most funny. Little wonder that the world seems strange. At least to me. Though I've learned to revere and love life. Including the far-flung characters that I encounter every day. Convinces me that god has a sense of humor. In that he created many clowns and court jesters. --Jim Broede

The wonderful pulsebeat.

I like rainy days. But come to think of it, I like sunny days, too. And warm days. And cold days. Seems to me that I like every day. Just being alive. Able to savor life. Doesn't matter whether it's rainy. Or sunny. I'll make the best of it. I'm indoors now. Looking outdoors. Heavy clouds. A light breeze. I suspect a jacket will be required. If I go out. But now I prefer being at my computer. Thinking. Writing. I'm with my dearest feline friend. Loverboy. All curled up on a cushion. On my desk. So contented. He's setting a fine example. For me. I'm contented, too. Interesting, isn't it? How one becomes satisfied with life. With the moment. By becoming aware. Of the pulsebeat of life. Yes, that's what I'm feeling now. The wonderful pulsebeat. --Jim Broede

Maybe they have no clue.

Nice thing about my blog. Helps to remind me what's going on in my life. Makes me think. To write something. Daily. I sort of wish all my friends had blogs. Diaries, of sort. That allowed me to peek in. But I suspect most people are afraid. They prefer privacy. To not share what's going on inside their beings. But I tend to bare everything. Even my soul. I've come to like nakedness. In a way, it's a form of courage. A way to venture out. Into the world. I really have nothing to hide. Maybe it's that I like being me. I suspect many people don't wanna be themselves. Or maybe they have no clue. --Jim Broede

Yes, I love my addictions.

I really am addicted. To exercise. Mental. And physical. I write every day. Thoughts. Anything that comes to mind. I allow the thoughts to come naturally. The same way that I perform physical exercise. With a rhythm. Today I pedaled my bicycle for 35 miles. Mostly along a circular one-mile route. Repeatedly. I was in a semi-hypnotic trance. I had an earphone radio turned on. Listening to the news. And to sports. And to classical music. And then I walked/jogged 4 miles. In an hour. A nice, easy-going, relaxed pace. And I took 90 minutes to eat supper. Slowly. And I read the newspaper. And a book. About philosophy. Socrates. And before I go to bed, I'll write a love letter/email to my Italian true love. So that it will be waiting for her in the morning. When she gets up. Which will be about the time I go to bed. There's a 7-hour time difference. That's right. I have another addiction. To my true love. Yes, I love my addictions. --Jim Broede

Long live socialism!

I am heartened by the French and the Greeks. They've ousted right wing politicians in favor of leftists. Yes, socialists. My kind of people. The French and the Greeks are saying to hell with austerity being foisted on them by conservatives. By the likes of American Republicans. Instead, the French and the Greeks want the rich to be taxed at higher rates. To pay for more public sector jobs. To pay for a social services safety net. To make life better for the poor and the middle class. Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Halllelujah! That's what will improve the economy. Not austerity. Not programs that make the rich richer and the poor poorer. It's time to redistribute the wealth. To narrow the obscene gap between the rich and the poor. Time to serve the common good. The rich will still be rich. But less rich. That's the right and decent and humane thing to do. Yes, make the poor less poor and the rich less rich. It's time for America to follow the leads of the French and the Greeks. Certainly, the Italians and the Spanish and the Irish and the Portugese will soon follow. Yes, we can solve our economic problems worldwide. By moving to the left. In unison. By embracing socialism. Sure beats economic/political/social systems designed by greedy capitalists. --Jim Broede

Life is too precious to hate.

So very much of life is either feast or famine. Extremes. Lightness and darkness. Life and death. Maybe the secret of survival is to find middle ground. Balance. Hovering somewhere inbetween. But also able to experience the extremes. On the good ends. Life is much better than death. I prefer lightness over darkness. But hey, there's something nice about dark, too. Makes it easier to sleep. Here in Minnesota the weather has been dry. Very dry. For several months. But in the past few days, we've been deluged with rain. Standing water all over the place. Pools in my yard. In which fish could survive. To tell the truth, I try to make the best of extremes. I like it very dry. When I'm out on the Arizona desert. And I like it wet, when I'm on the Mediterranean Sea. I'll take whatever I get. And make the best of it. Might as well. Sure beats wishing for something different. Because that might make me unhappy. If I don't get it. Yes, that's another extreme. Sadness and happiness. I'm in constant pursuit of happiness. And always, I find it. Eventually. Requires a little bit of patience. And lo and behold, happiness creeps up on me. Usually, in the form of love. Of course, there's also the other extreme. Hate. But I can't recall the last time I hated anything. It's been so long ago. I've discovered that life is too precious to hate. --Jim Broede

Focused on the good stuff.

One has to learn to compartmentalize life. To separate the bad stuff from the good stuff. To more or less turn off a switch. Or to find a way to get respite. To treat one's self kindly. To not allow people and the pitfalls to drag one down. For instance, I sort of wrote off my sister for many years. Because she's an alcoholic who refused to recover. Until very recently. Now she's all right. She did the right thing. She had to do it of her own volition. I tried to assist her. Up to a point. But eventually I decided to get out of her life. Because it was too depressing to watch. Maybe that makes me cruel. But hey, it made me sane. And I got on with living my life. Recognizing that I can't be all things to all people. I can help some. But I can't help everyone. That's impossible. But if I'm gonna help anyone, I have to take care of myself. To be in mental and emotional and physical condition to be able to respond effectively. My dear wife Jeanne died of Alzheimer's a little over 5 years ago. After 13 years of coping. In various ways. For years, I was a 24/7 care-giver. Because I truly loved Jeanne. But at a point, I had to become an 8-10 hour-a-day caregiver. And that made me a more effective care-giver. Really, a more loving care-giver. Because I went home from the nursing home every night and took care of myself. I got daily respite. That was good for Jeanne. And good for me. Yes, for both of us. I put reasonable balance into my life. I did the right thing for Jeanne. And the right thing for me. Amazing, isn't it? I compartmentalized my life. And in the process, at the nursing home, I became involved with caring for other dementia patients. I became more understanding. Of everyone. I was able to spread myself around. I was better serving the common good. And my good, too. I became a well-rested and proficient juggler. I learned to take life one day at a time. To savor what I could savor. To make the best of each day, each moment. And that revitalized me. On a daily basis. I'm still doing it. I'm in daily pursuit of happiness. I'm in love again. With my Italian true love. Living half of the year with her in Sardinia. And when I'm not there, I'm connected with her on Skype. An audio/video connection on the Internet. And this summer she will be living with me. At my lake home in Minnesota. And though I'm retired, after writing for newspapers almost all of my life, I'm still writing. About life and love. Whatever compels me. In my blog. Called Broede's Broodings. You can get it by googling the title. On the Internet. All I can say is, thank gawd. I am in love. With life. Just the way it's supposed to be. Focused on the good stuff. --Jim Broede

Maybe he'll stay for a while.

My neighbor, two doors to the south, has been mostly absent over the past several years. He built a mansion. And hardly ever lived in it. Put the place up for sale almost right away. Listed at $2 million-plus. Called it a 'dream home' on the for sale sign. Even has an indoor swimming pool. Despite being on the lake. Which, in itself, is a vast swimming pool. Anyway, the mansion hasn't sold. The same goes for his father's mansion. Next door to the son. That one was listed for $4.5 million. By Sotheby's. On the international market. Suppose I should be grateful to these rich people. Because being so close to gaudy mansions enhances the value of my property. Some day, somebody will buy my shack and bulldoze it down. To put up still another mansion. Instead of Hayward Avenue, the street may be dubbed Mansion Row. Anyway, the long-absent rich man's son showed up the other day. Don't know if it's a temporary thing. Maybe a break from his other home in northern Minnesota. Or maybe he's gonna stay for a while. --Jim Broede

What would Nelson Mandela do?

Think about it. It's not the worst thing in the world to be a communist. Or an atheist. One can be a good communist. And a good atheist, too. Just as easily as one could be a bad capitalist or a bad monotheist or a bad Christian. Personally, I'd rather be a good something rather than a bad something. And I'd rather be honest than dishonest. Thing is that we tend to peg people. In negative ways. Especially in America. It's a national trait. To bad-mouth people. Especially those on the opposite side of our spectrum. I'm a little bit different. In that I like people. Even bad capitalists. And bad Christians. Because I'm supposed to respect my enemies. If not love 'em. If somebody does me wrong, I'm supposed to give serious thought to forgiveness. I don't know why. Other than I have an innate feeling about right and wrong. I keep asking myself such questions as what would Nelson Mandela do? --Jim Broede

Pure hate. For each other.

The blame game. That's what we play in America. We blame each other for our woes. Republicans blame Democrats. And Democrats blame Republicans. But with Republicans, it's gotten so bad that they even blame each other. For instance, look at the GOP's presidential aspirants. During the primary campaign, they savaged each other. Providing fuel for Barack Obama to use. Against Mitt Romney. Slurs used by Romney's fellow Republicans. Foul, mean-spirited stuff. From the mouths of his fellow Republicans. That's the nature of American politics. Tear down everybody. But especially one's rivals. Castigate. Call them evil. Liars. Scumbags. It's not enough to disagree on issues any more. One must become unfriendly in the most unfriendly ways. Downright hateful. And oh, yes, call members of the other party communists. A Republican congressman from Florida says there are 81 communists (Democrats) serving in congress now. Shades of age-old McCarthyism. We Americans in the political realm are working against each other. Rather than with each other. We are pulling for each other to fail. Miserably. Even if that means bringing America crashing down around us. We wish the worst. Of everything. We Americans have put the concept of love on the scrap heap. Instead, we have created pure hate. For each other. --Jim Broede

My eternity.

Life is remarkable. Yes, I never cease to be amazed. By the awareness that I'm a conscious, living human being. I don't always stop to think about it. But when I do, I can hardly believe it. The circumstances. That brought about my birth. My existence. Lots of things had to happen. Coincidences. The very fact that my mother and my father happened along, and met. And married. For the sake of convenience. Rather than for love. And then procreated. Exactly when they did. On a particular day. I could so easily have never been. And some day, I will be no more. But here I am. Very real. At this very moment. Not only remarkable. But incredible. Fantastic. I came from nothingness. And maybe that's where I'll go again. Into nothingness. With no knowledge that I ever lived. Of course, the most remarkable thing is my ability to imagine everlasting life. It's comforting. To have an imagination. It's allowed me to create myself. And to fall in love. With someone. With life. Maybe for only an instant in time. But I keep reminding myself. That this life I am living is my foreverness. My eternity. --Jim Broede

Communing with spirits.

My oldest neighbor is Ed Hinrichs. He's gonna turn 90 later this year. I suppose there'll be a big celebration. Ed is a World War II veteran. Not many of 'em around any more. Ed makes me feel good. Because he reminds me that I'm not the oldest fella in the neighborhood. I suspect there may be a few others still older. Anyway, I can remember World War II. And oh, so many, many wars. Seems to me that the USA is always involved in a war of one kind or another. If not an all-out fighting war -- well, then a war on drugs or a war on terrorism. Anyway, I was fortunate enough to be too young to serve in World War II. I suppose that when I was a youngster, there were still a few veterans from the Civil War. Imagine that. That makes me feel truly old. My paternal grandfather was still living in the 1940s. He was an illegal immigrant. Sneaked into the U.S. from Germany around 1900. And he would have been old enough to serve in World War I. But he didn't. Because he lied about his age. To avoid the draft. Gotta give grandpa credit. He wasn't so stupid to get sent back to Germany to kill Germans, or anyone. I'll have to talk to Ed some day. About war. And whether World War II was a good war. Is there such a thing? I'm also assuming that Ed is of German heritage. And I wonder if he had any German relatives he might have been fighting. If he had any qualms about that. I have German relatives. And I visit 'em in Germany. Fairly often. And they come to visit me, too. Just think. I've walked the very same ground that my ancestors walked in the 17th, 18th and 19th centuries. Made me feel like I was communing with spirits. Sent chills of delight up and down my spine. Maybe Ed had similar experiences. I'll ask. --Jim Broede

You and I really don't have a say.

The wealthy run the show in America. Money. Money. Money. Those who have the money have the political power. It's that simple. Any billionaire has a billion times more power than I. Or for that matter, more power than the entire middle class and the poor put together. Yes, the millionaires and the billionaires call the shots. America has been corrupted. By the elite rich. We've become a plutocracy. And until we take money out of politics, it's gonna remain that way. In theory, in a democracy or a republic, everyone is supposed to have a vote and a say. And we're told we have a truly representative government. Because we elect our officials. At virtually all levels of government. But once in office, these officials are bought. By the highest bidders. By the plutocrats. You and I really don't have a say. --Jim Broede

I trust me. More than anyone.

I trust government. It's the people that run government that I don't trust. Especially conservatives. And Republicans. And dishonest officials. Some of 'em are one and the same. If government is run all right, it's good. That goes for American government or socialist government or communist government or big government or small government or local, state and federal government. Even world government. I could warm up to almost any kind of government. As long as it's run right and proper and serves the common good. I also trust private business and big corporations. Except for the people that run 'em. Especially if they are crooks or greedy capitalists. Maybe I distrust people the most. Though I do trust my closest friends. Especially my Italian true love. And come to think of it, I trust me. More than anyone. --Jim Broede

I'm in control.

I want life to go in certain ways. Pleasing ways for me. But I know damn well that ain't gonna always happen. Only sometimes. And when things go right, I relish and savor the occasions. Makes me happy. But I try not to be sad when things go wrong. Because usually there's nothing I can do about it. Other than to keep an upbeat and positive attitude about life, in general. I count my blessings. And try to discount the pitfalls. And try not to worry. For instance, it could become worrisome if Republicans make big political gains in the November elections. But why worry about it? Because it might not happen. Might as well stay optimistic. And if Republicans make a sweep, I'll deal with it. Really won't change my personal life in any dramatic or significant ways. Could change other people's lives. But not mine. I'll continue to focus on my many blessings. Living one day at a time. Trying to make the best of each day, each moment. Without fretting. Better to just get on with life. That's my practice. And it returns many happy dividends. More and more, I'm learning to control my destiny. But more important, I'm able to control my attitude. In positive ways. --Jim Broede

Wouldn't trade love for anything.

If I expect the worst to happen, it usually does. Especially when it comes to the Chicago Cubs, my favorite baseball team. For instance, today the Cubs went into he ninth inning leading Cincinnati by 3-0. The Cubs starter was breezing along. With a three-hitter. Pitching superb baseball. But the Cubs manager decided to bring in his closer to get the final three outs. And I had a terrible feeling. That the Cubs would blow the game. Sure enough, the closer was ineffective. Walked three batters. Gave up a hit. And the Cubs committed an error. Cincinnati tied the game in the 9th. And then pushed across the winning run in the 10th. Yes, the Cubs lost, 4-3. In typical Cubs fashion. Used to be I'd consider such a loss a heartbreaker. But I've toughened up. I expect the worst. I've become a negative thinker when it comes to Cubs baseball. No way will the Cubs ever win a World Series. Not in my lifetime. They haven't won one since 1908. Long before I was born. And they won't win another World Series. Even if I live to be 200. Because when it comes to Cubs baseball, I'm a negative thinker. Fully. Completely. As for other aspects of my life, I'm a positive thinker. Especially when it comes to love. I'm a romantic idealist. I'm in love with life. Despite my addiction to the terrible Cubs. Knowing full well, they'll always be losers. Never going all the way. I accept that. In some respects, maybe that makes me a truly positive thinker. Because I've learned acceptance. I accept the fact that I can't have everything. Yes, love is sufficient. That makes me happy enough. I wouldn't trade love for the Cubs fulfilling my impossible dream. --Jim Broede

I have divided loyalties.

My conservative Republican neighbors won't like it. But that's their problem. I've hoisted two flags in my yard. Flags of Sardinia and Italy. They flapped in a southerly breeze today. For everybody to see. I'm doing this as a gesture of appreciation. For my second homeland. I'm now living half of the year with my Italian true love. In Italy. On the island of Sardinia. In the Mediterranean Sea. I'm a proud citizen of the world. Not merely just an American. And if the Republicans take control of American government, I might consider living abroad year-round. Permanently. Could be that my rich Republican neighbors might even take up a collection and buy me a one-way 'good riddance' ticket. Out of town. Anyway, I have options. I'll live where I'm most happy. At the moment, in both places. Italy. And the USA. By the way, I'm not flying the Stars and Stripes. Leaving that to my next door neighbor -- a super patriot. --Jim Broede

Learning how to love. Each other.

Just some random thoughts. Why is it that American politicians have no qualms about going into huge debt to fight wars? But steadfastly refuse to spend beyond our means to help our own citizens. Especially in bad economic times. Doesn't make sense. We proclaim that we can afford wars. But we can't afford rebuilding America. From within. Seems to me we have our priorities out of whack. We try to fix the rest of the world. Before we fix America. Think of all the money we've dumped down ratholes in Iraq and Afghanistan. And in fighting communists all over the world. For decades. Almost seems like an eternity. And in the process, we've neglected the needs of our own people. Oh, not everyone. We've managed to cater to the rich and big business. And ignored the poor and the middle class. Widening the gap between the rich and poor. Indeed, a sad state of affairs. Makes me ashamed to be an American. Anyway, I've discovered that most communists and socialists are good people. I know. I mix with 'em in other parts of the world. We misjudge so many people. Atheists, for instance. I know so very many nice atheists. Nicer than many hypocritical Christians and Muslims. One doesn't have to believe in a god to be a decent human being. It's not even a requirement to be a capitalist to be a decent human being. Yes, we have to learn to accept each other. Despite our differences. I'm for human decency. For tolerance. For learning how to love. Not only life. But each other. --Jim Broede

Politics ain't a fair game.

It'll never happen. But I'd like to see a sense of fairness in politics. From both sides of the aisle. Republicans and Democrats treating each other with mutual respect. Actually finding ways to work with each other. To find solutions to problems. For the sake of the common good. For the best interests of the country. Instead, politicians will continue to bad-mouth and obstruct each other. Because that's the nature of politics. But it doesn't have to be. If only political leaders came to their senses. Of course, politics are partisan. By tradition. But it doesn't have to be. Objectivity and fairness could reign. Just think of the benefits coming from such an approach. Seems to me that the purpose of ungawdly politics is to make one's opponent look bad. By whatever means it takes. Including dirty tricks. And lies. And insults. No such thing as reasonable compromise anymore. In every day dealings with our fellow human beings, we are expected to act fairly. Except when it comes to politics. Why is that? --Jim Broede

The happiest couple.

Until a few days ago, I was known as the bicycle man. By a youngster. But now I'm known as Broede. And I know the youngster's parents. Brian and Cici. And it's possible they are the happiest couple in my neighborhood. For many reasons. Not the least being that they have two youngsters. And life is good. They live in a nice big yellow house on a lake. And Brian is employed. In a good job. With a medical supply company. Which gives him opportunity to travel in Europe. On business. And Cici teaches first grade. In a public school. They moved into the neighborhood. Maybe two or three years ago. Many times I passed Brian and Cici while riding my bicycle or walking. But we never bothered to get introduced. Until I steered my bicycle into their driveway. And boldly announced that it was time for introductions. Because I'm on a mission. To meet my neighbors. And to start calling 'em by name. My ultimate aim is to learn something significant about each of my many neighbors. People living within a half-mile radius of me. I still have many to go. Anyway, Brian and Cici met when they attended the same college. Winona State. They fell in love. And got married five years ago. They honeymooned in Italy. Around Tuscany. And in Florence. So we have something in common. I live half of the year with my Italian true love. In Sardinia. And I'm recommending that when Brian and Cici return to Italy some day, they come to Sardinia. Where I'll show them a good time. --Jim Broede